England's Geographical Curse

Географическое проклятие Англии
Do Russia and India have a common historical enemy? Yes. Is America this enemy? No.

Is it any other country? No, not even England. There is an evil of biblical proportions inside England, but that evil, albeit as English as a king hit (or two in quick succession), is not England. This evil is the British monarchy.

We can and we will discuss the British monarchy somewhen, but for now let us come to the main point.

England’s geographical curse is the fact that its only guaranteed ally, the USA, is located 5000 kilometres to its west, while its closest potential enemy –being the Czech Republic– is located merely 900 kilometres to its east. These distances are traversable by nuclear payload carrying cruise missiles in 6 hours and 1 hour respectively.

If a nuclear bomb falls on London then the only guaranteed nuclear retaliation will be from the USA, because of two reasons. The first reason is that NATO has got only two genuinely committed members, being the two countries which thought up the North Atlantic alliance, the UK and the USA. The second reason is that the USA is the only superpower in NATO, and hence is the only country in NATO which has the capacity to retaliate in a nuclear war. Now the distance from Portland in Maine to Karlovy Vary on the western border of the Czech Republic is about 5800 kilometres. This distance can be traversed by a nuclear payload carrying cruise missile in around 7 hours.

Now the very first question which can be asked in the context of the above scenario is that why on earth will the Czech Republic leave NATO and cross over to the side of Russia? The answer is fourfold.

First, all the East European Countries except Greece are Slavic countries, and this is something which they have in common with Russia. The Czech Republic is no exception to this rule. Blood is, and will remain thicker than water.

Second, the people of all these Slavic countries have very strong collective memories of being treated with contempt by Anglo Saxons after 1991. So much so that Anglo Saxons treat the people of these countries with contempt even inside their own countries whenever the former travel to the countries of the latter. It may be added here that the kind of racism faced by the people of these countries if they travel to or decide to try to live in any Anglo Saxon country is absolutely breathtaking. These bitter memories render NATO unstable as an alliance as long as East European countries are its members.

Thirdly there is only one superpower in NATO while there are now two superpowers standing against NATO. (These two superpowers are Russia and China, it may be mentioned for the benefit of the average UPSC civil service exam aspirant.) This reason is by itself sufficient reason for East European countries to change sides.

Fourthly the Slavic countries of Eastern Europe are like a bunch of dominos if attacked from the east, that is to say if attacked by Russia, but are like a fortress of steel if attacked from the west, either by Germany or by France or by England, or their alliance.

Why are they like a bunch of dominos if attacked from the east? The answer is very short. Any army marching from the border of Belarus to the Atlantic coast of France needs to travel only 1800 kilometres. The first east European capital city to fall in such a scenario is Warsaw, which is only 100 kilometres from the Belarus Poland border. 100 kilometres is a very short distance indeed. Even a terrorist carrying a stinger missile can walk this distance in two days, leave alone missiles and bombs.

Why do these Slavic countries turn into a fortress of steel if they join Russia? Well, which NATO general in his right mind will try to march eastward, from the western border of the Czech republic, across Eastern Europe and Russia, right up to Bering's Strait? Eastern Europe without Russia consists of a single time zone. Add the eleven time zones of Russia and you have more than half the planet. Add China, North Korea, Central Asia, and possibly India, and the UK is left with no ally between Germany and Japan.

So which country will retaliate on behalf of the UK in the event of a nuclear war? Your guess is as good as mine.


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Published by Manish Udar

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Last updated on 16th April 2022
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